Still Bill

Released in 2009, this documentary catches up with 1970s/80s R&B singer-songwriter Bill Withers, who wrote, among a lot of songs to which you might be surprised to find you know all the words (“Lean on Me,” “Lovely Day,” “Just the Two of Us”), one of my very favorites: “Ain’t No Sunshine.”

He released his final studio album in 1989 and left the limelight with little explanation in the early 90s. After growing up in a coal mining camp in West Virginia with a stutter, serving 9 years in the Navy and making toilet seats on a Boeing production line, Withers didn’t find fame until, with zero music education or experience, he wrote his first song, “…Sunshine,” in his early 30s. Incredible. I’m a fan and this doc only increased my appreciation of the music and the man. Especially touching are his visit to a theater group for kids with stutters and his daughter, Kori, singing her song “Blue Blues” for him.

Incidentally, I learned about this one listening to the podcast "The Joe Rogan Experience." Turns out the former Taekwando champion, “Talk Radio” player, “Fear Factor” host and current UFC commentator, is a pretty clever monkey and a rock solid comic. His specials “Live” and “Talking Monkeys in Space” are both streamable on Netflix.

As Blake would say now, “ooh-ooh-ooh-ah-ah-ah!"

Apes Will Rise

Well, that's a shame. Being that exposition is always my favorite part, the prequel Rise of the Planet of the Apes is set right where I prefer to vacation. Iconic franchise, great cast, exciting trailer, complete with blatting horns and tick-ticky stopwatch tension. And yet, no deal.

For the same reason True Grit (2010), despite all the knockdown, dragout kickassery it featured, left me disappointed in the end, Rise will fall: cartoon monkeys. True, Grit's failure was snakes, but the dissimulacrumilarity's the same. (Yep! New word, made it up, try it free for 30 days.) Why go digital when you can so easily use practical effects. See: the snake chamber in Raiders, the shapeshift in An American Werewolf in London, Kermit riding a bike. What do these movies have in common? They're all more than 25 years old. Surely suits and prosthetics have improved in the last generation. Weta Digital's behind the animation here, which is funny considering their role in the Rings Trilogy, populated with legions of suited, masked, completely convincing orcs and tigers and bears. Oh my.

Also gorillas can't pull helicopters out of the sky. But who am I this morning, other than a bespectacled, over-caffeinated nerd in his pajamas. Watch the trailer and decide for yourself.

'Friends' Clone Round-Up

‘Traffic Light’ The slightest of the contenders. Less funny than just amusing. But, Roy from the office, and that dude w/ the big black glasses who was in ‘Scott Pilgrim.’

‘Cougar Town’ Funny, stars an actual Friend and Christa Miller of Scrubs 1.0. Plus drunks.

‘Perfect Couples’ Recently cancelled, but a favorite. Olivia Munn, Waitress from ‘Sunny,’ the Biederman doppelganger David Walton and dammit, when is Kyle Bornheimer of the late, great ‘Worst Week’ going to land a show that sticks?

‘Happy Endings’ The newest of the pack, and not bad. Elisha Cuthbert (bonus points if you know why this line is funny: “Are you trying to get yourself sold into white slavery?”), the grouchy blond from Scrubs 2.0, and the least annoying Wayans: Damon Jr., which is to say not Marlon. Also, most importantly, features my second favorite Casey Wilson.